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Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 9:16 am Subject: Nervous

Hey guys! Well after yesterday's stint of guests & their nasty put downs, I'm getting nervous about sending out the emails and certified letters. I'm afraid of my references being called which happen to be my sister & my brother on several of the loans as well as two friends. Nobody knows about the situation I'm in...especially my brother & sister. My parents have done so much to help me over the past 4 years, between a divorce, new marriage, a bankruptcy, birth of my daughter, purchasing my house to get out of an outrageous ARM loan. I'm so afraid of disappointing them. Of course Dad has always said...if you need money come to me. Doesn't matter if it's 5 bucks or 5,000 bucks. But after everything they've done, and all the money they've already spent on me...I just couldn't ask for another dime. I'm so afraid of them finding out about this whole mess.

Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 9:21 am Subject:

I had to swallow my pride many times when I was younger and ask for help. Now that my kids are grown, if I say to them, always come to me for help- I mean it!

Your parents know that everyone needs help at one point or another. Let them help you out.

Are thes debts pdls or credit card debts? They may call your references, but they can only verify where you live, etc, if I am not mistaken. They can't give out info on your credit, their collecting, etc.

Send out the documents you need to send-make copies, and go from there.

As to guest, or others nasty comments or put downs- PM a moderator, and they will take care of it!

Good Luck-keep us posted..KAren Very Happy

Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 9:24 am Subject:

IMK
I defaulted on 7 loans, and I can honestly say that not one ever called my references. Of course on the last two, I put down phony people and numbers. Still on the 5 that did have real references, no one ever called.
You will not disappoint anyone. You made a mistake, and now you are trying to correct it. It is a good thing you are doing , not a bad thing. How lucky you have been, that you have such good people in you life.Your parents sound like terrific people.

Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 9:29 am Subject:

Thanks guys! My parents are wonderful people. I've been very fortunate to have them in my life.

PDL's of course. I know my brother & sister have been in situations that my parents have helped them out in..so I'm not sure that they would ever say anything to them if the pdl's were to call them.

Thanks for the support guys!! It means a lot!

Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 9:31 am Subject:

Hi lmk-It happens...its happened to me and many people here on the boards. Like bossy said, sometimes you have to swallow your pride and just know there is a light at the end of the tunnel!

As kash said, I too have put down phony references but my real ones have never been called.

Please be sure in your letters to specify to not call you OR your references.

Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 9:58 am Subject:

Cannr was awesome & provided me with a letter that covered every angle that could be thought of! So I think I'm pretty safe there.

Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 10:07 am Subject:

You are welcome- don't hesitate to ask questions, we are here to help!..KAren

Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 10:10 am Subject: IMK3524

IMK3524, Hey we all make mistakes and sometimes over and over again. Lord knows I have finanacially. And it seems that I have that same mind frame you have, but it comes down to having peace of mind or staying in that financial rut. If you parents said trust me they meant it. GO ahead get out this and move forward from here. Some of us don't have parents to go to YOU DO!!

Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 10:13 am Subject:

HEY IMK3524, yes Cannr is great!!! But letter was that. Because I am trying to get out the PDL cycle. I am currently trying to get rid of them and sending letters as well.

Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 10:22 am Subject:

I'll email it to ya.

Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 10:25 am Subject:

ok i sent it..check your messages thanks lisa

Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 10:29 am Subject:

cannr if u're out there...i hope it was okay to pass on your awesome letter???

Guest · Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 10:44 am Subject:

I also was nervous about sending my letters but I did it and I haven't had any calls to my references yet and it has been over 2 months since I got into trouble with my pdls. I am a very private person when it comes to my finances so I know how you feel. If you need any help with letters I can send you one I used. Hang in there and don't give up.