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Posted: Fri May 30, 2008 8:46 am Subject: Childsupport question

Does anyone know if you can get your childsupport lowered? I am only asking because we pay a VERY high amount to my husband's exwife and my husband is having to now work 30 hours a week overtime just to make ends meet. We pay for the insurance and we pay half of the co-pays when the kids go to the doctor. His ex cheated on him with his best friend and they are now married. At the time of the divorce, he didn't know she was with him and wanted to get back together, so he gave her the house (fully paid for, which she sold right after the divorce) a new car and paid her almost 300 a week in childsupport. We now pay 1100 a month which is really high and when that was decided, my husband was single. Now he is remarried (to me) and we have 2 more kids. She is saying she is going to take us back to court for more childsupport because my husband is working overtime (and she knows it) and she is wanting more money based upon his overtime, but we need that overtime just to barely make it. They live in a 260K dollar house and pay only 500 a month for his kids support because he is self employed. We live in a rent house and can't get caught up enough to keep up with our bills. I am just frustrated with it all. To top it all off, we are receiving hits on my husband's credit due to dishnetwork that she had at the house when he first moved out and didn't tell him and a credit card that she took out AFTER he moved out and made one payment on. We have reported those items as fraud, but since they weren't divorced at the time, it is going to be hard to get those resolved...

Posted: Fri May 30, 2008 8:47 am Subject:

Usually child support is determined based on income. If you are having problems affording child support you will have to go back to court with your lawyer to see if it can be lowered.

Posted: Fri May 30, 2008 8:58 am Subject:

I have been told in the past that it is possible to get it lowered due to new children/marriage/lifestyle changes. That is what I am trying to find out prior to hiring a lawyer, which we really can't afford.

Posted: Fri May 30, 2008 9:01 am Subject:

Most lawyers will usually give you a free to take a look at you situation and see if he can help.

Posted: Fri May 30, 2008 9:52 am Subject:

Definitely get that checked out. The money is supposed to support the kids, not the ex's lifestyle.

If your husband's income has dropped, or he has additional expenses (like the kids, etc), the case should be reviewed. You need to find a lawyer that will work with you - at least try legal aid or something.

Posted: Fri May 30, 2008 10:13 am Subject:

Thanks. Hey, do you guys know about the rules for childsupport and divorces? She has let their oldest child (11) chose to be homeschooled. I thought that was something that she and my husband would have to decide on together, but she just did it. She claims it is because boys are getting curious and she wants to keep her home to keep her safe, but everytime we call they are out shopping or she is babysitting for her mom while she is out. She didn't attend reguarly when she was at school and I think she did this so she'd have a sitter and so she didn't have to take her to school.

straycat · Posted: Fri May 30, 2008 11:37 am Subject:

I live in VA. Here you do not have an atty to have CS recalculated. If I were you I would call the courts and ask how to set a date with the judge.

Posted: Fri May 30, 2008 11:49 am Subject:

Thanks we live in Texas but I'll do that. I appreciate the info!

Posted: Fri May 30, 2008 2:11 pm Subject:

As far as the homeschooling thing being something both parents would have to decide, that would have to be written into the divorce decree (as in, both parents will consult each other in regards to decisions about the child's healthcare, schooling, religious training,etc.) - at least that's what I was told with mine.

However, if your husband is at all concerned about how things are being handled, he needs to get an attorney. I realize you feel you can't afford it, but you also can't afford to let this continue if it's something you're concerned is damaging to the child.

justhanging · Posted: Fri May 30, 2008 2:23 pm Subject: Childsupport question

I really hate to hear that...I know your husband loves his kids, but to think that his and your hard earn money is giving his ex a better life style...has your husband ever thought about talking to his ex best friend?

Not sure that will help...just a thought...I am no expert but have heard stuff from my sister-in-law dealing with her husband's ex...she really gives them a hard time...

I would definitely seek council and try to go back to court....good luck....

Posted: Fri May 30, 2008 6:07 pm Subject:

thanks. Yes we have talked with his ex best friend. We went to dinner just the 4 of us one night. He likes the lifestyle he has become familiar with...He (the new husband) wants all of the kids to be homeschooled. As a matter of fact, he is trying to just swoop in and take over. The kids call him Daddy, which kills my husband. They call me by my first name, not Mommy. At first they were forced to call him Daddy. When my husband would question them on it, they said they were corrected by their mom each time they called him by his name. She would tell them to call him Daddy. My husband confronted her about it and she said No, the kids just love him and want to call him that. It all stinks. Kids are the ones punished when Mom and Dad can't get it right.

Thanks for all of the help

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