AMEX, Chase, BofA, BMW Credit Card - $125K in debt - HELP !!

Hi there - I am new to this board and I love all of your posts and your wonderful advice!! I have decided to settle with my card companies - I have been out of work for 6 months and am now losing two houses (one was a rental) to short sales here in California (I think that is the best way to handle rather than foreclose as I couldn't sell them in a regular fashion since they are worth way less than I owe on them and I can no longer afford them) and, even though I am in the IT field, I cannot find a job right now - bummer !! I am looking WAAAAAAAY hard though!! I hope this economy gets better.

Question - A family member is promising to gift me some money in January at which time I will be about 180 days past due. I have been calling all of my creditors and letting them know and they have all been pretty nice and understanding, except for American Express. With $180K in debt and my uncle being able to give me about $50,000, do any of you think it is possible to settle out? I know each company is different, but is there any information on which creditor settles more of the time on X% , etc.? Each creditor has told me (except for AMEX, who I am the most worried about) that, as long as I keep in contact with them, that they will do everything they can do to keep me in their in-house collections. Any advice? I gave you a sample in the subject line of my credit cards - the biggies - there are a few more too. Thanks so much - I am so nervous and scared !!