car loan

I live in Ca. I bought a car in 2000 and paid monthly payments via automatic pay out of my pay check (military) There were two payments that were to be deferred to get the auto pay set up. (made 6 payments then the next two were deferred or so I was told then the auto payments started) Well come to find out Capital One started calling us (6 years into a 7 year loan) that they never processed that deferrement and could not find any trace of it nor did I keep it (yes-dumb move on my part) and had been charging me late fees and intrest on the late fees each month even though I had been paying monthly I had over $3500 added to the loan in fees--never got statements after I set up the automatic pay from them)

I kept the automatic pay going for the length of contract plus 2 extra months to pay what we owed for the loan. We have asked in writing for account history statement or the title but all we get is our orignal letter with writing by different departments on the outside of the envelope sent back to us in their envelop no letter from them no title nothing just our letter back. I have sent them certified and still nothing from them in writting.

All of a sudden 9 years after we took out the loan and and 2 years after we paid off what we know we owe they started calling us (debt collector as the orginal loan shows up as charged off for 3 years even though we were still making monthly payments). They are calling family members in other states to say to make sure we call them---I want all contact to be done in writing and have asked that in the letters to them. We still have the car--never repo'd since we were making monthly payments---we want to get rid of it as it is totaled out in a wreck last year and is sitting in the garage but we can't get the title from them.

HELP.
Thanks