I don't know what to do or how to get help !! I'll

I don't know what to do or how to get help !! I'll try to make this short but its a long story....anyhow in Jan.'10 my spouse was arrested for dv rightfully...in his revenge he cancelled my auto wd meanwhile bank never notified me when I did find out I called wells Fargo immediately still unaware of what happened with spouse stopping the auto wd until months later ....I was only 1 month behind when I found out I made a month and 3/4 payment and called back a week later to finish paying what I owed only to be told I couldn't make anymore payments and was advised to do a loan mod. So I did and they lost my paperwork multiple times put in wrong info in their systems finally I hired a co. To do this for me paying 2,400$ with 2,000 back gaurented if they we're unsuccessful a few months later after repeating this horribly confusing loan mod. Paperwork wells Fargo call and insist I pay nearly 3,000 for them to review my loan req. Which I had to do a cash advance. Only to be denied because as they said ' We don't understand why you pay your bills on time...but not us ' They said couldn't pay them!!!! Oh and my spouse was not on thus loan so there was no right for him to call in the first place bank should have contacted me...right? So now I have 2 toddlers in preschool that I pay for roughly 1800 month also I pay for this entire household mortgage groceries, clothes,propane everything!!! A lot on my own as for my spouse he us bipolar just finding out and is so unsupportive financially,emotionally etc. I need these charges to be in one payment with low interest for me to survive. The spouse wants me to file chptr 7 but I don't know if that's what I should do or if its all part of his destructing me...which he's done well :( please give me advice um on the verge of a breakdown!!! email removed per tos