threats from a collector

I assume you mean a 3rd party collection agency. A collector may contact other people, but only to find out where you live, what your phone number is, and where you work. Collectors usually are prohibited from contacting such third parties more than once. In most cases, the collector may not tell anyone other than you and your attorney that you owe money. Go to the Federal Trade Commission's home site ftc.gov to look up the FDCPA.