overwhelmed with managing money

My wife and I have been married 12 years and have been in debt the entire time. We have mortgage payment, 2 car payments, accounts in collections and still owe toward our student loans from college. We both have decent jobs and know that we can fix this, but we just can't seem to even get started. I am very motivated to fix this and although my wife wants to be out of debt she is not as motivated. She has been primarily in charge of our finances and takes it personally when I want to discuss our problems. I am so stressed because I want a good credit score, savings, and we will have our first child going to college in just 6 years. It overwhelms me to think that I could still have 30,000 + in student loans when my child starts college. We don't have any current credit cards but have several that are in collections now. I'm just looking for any advice, suggestions, support, encouragment to get the ball rolling on this. Thanks!