Should I settle debts or file divorce?
Depends on you.
You'll be still responsible for paying off $40,000 after divorce since creditors have nothing to do with it.
You can settle debts if they have been incurred after marriage.
File for divorce if he is determined to not change his attitude towards money. Why should you suffer?
Yes, it depends on you.
You can opt for a debt settlement program and negotiate with your creditors.
You can file for divorce if you want to, but before that, try again once to make him understand the situation.