Hi to all...
Date: Mon, 08/18/2008 - 09:50
Submitted by SUEBEEHONEY70
on
Mon, 08/18/2008 - 09:50
Total Replies: 22
I'm sorry for my absence lately, but it's been very crazy for me lately. It's a long story, but let's just say my stress level got too high and I needed to take a break from things for a while. I am hoping to come back in the next few days and do more Mod stuff. I don't see much need for anything other than spam deletion and general board monitoring, so I'll be here, but probably in the background a lot.
I wanted to post this here rather than the Pub, because I don't care to deal with the general public's responses on this. Please do not move this to the Pub. I am in dire straits financially right now, and merely want to ask for your prayers and kind thoughts and emotional support. The whole ordeal with my home foreclosure, bankruptcy, etc. has really piled up on me, and the attorney is just about bleeding me dry. Add to that the fact that I've only received 1/2 the normal child support this summer due to one child going to his dad's and one staying here, and you've got a recipe for financial disaster. (I know I could have legally kept ALL the child support for the summer, but trying to be fair, he has to pay for a summer program for our son that far exceeds the 1/2 of the child support he is keeping.)
My Ebay sales have helped, but not enough to keep up with the bills right now. I don't know too many people that can afford to shell out an extra $500 in a month's time to an attorney, and still try to pay their normal bills.
This week, I have about $700 of expenses and a $300 paycheck. I'm trying to figure out how to handle all this. I may be able to put a couple of the bills off until next week, but it just makes it that much harder to catch up if I keep putting them off. There are a few that I simply can't put off.
I have to pick up my youngest from his dad in another state (we meet 1/2 way between our two home states, which are over 600 miles apart), so there's about 2 tanks of gas - and that's this weekend. I thought about asking him to bring our son all the way here, but in the past, when he has asked me to do that for him, I've done it, but he's paid half of my expenses for the trip. I cannot afford to pay half the expenses for this trip if he agrees to bring our son all the way home. The only option if I did that would be to let him keep part of the child support for the next month - which would only put me further behind. :evil: He probably wouldn't agree to it anyway - it would interfere with his work schedule.
The old evil PDL monster raised it's ugly head in my mind several times today, saying "just take out a PDL - you can pay it back in a couple of weeks - it's not a big deal"...and I even Googled a few and started to fill out the applications before I stopped myself. I don't need that extra headache. I don't have any family/friends to borrow from at this point, nor do I want to. I hate owing anyone anything.
I'm sorry this is so long. Thank you for letting me vent, though. I needed to just get this out, I guess. I know we'll make it through, but I'll tell you what, sometimes it sure seems next to impossible. What I've mentioned here is only the tip of the iceberg when it comes to what is going on in my life right now, but the rest of it involves issues with my kids - especially my one adult child - so prayers for them would be appreciated as well.
I hope to be back soon as a Mod and continue my duties here...just bear with me and please send a few prayers and good thoughts my way...I sure could use them right now.
Thanks again.
Hey Sue Bee! I am glad you did not cave in the the PDL monster.
Hey Sue Bee! I am glad you did not cave in the the PDL monster. I will say a prayer for you and it will be answered. Not neccesarily how and when you might expect but it will.
I have been down a similar path and my faith got me through to a better place as can yours!
Sue - If you need help, I'm sure there are people that will dona
Sue - If you need help, I'm sure there are people that will donate points to you. I know it won't cover all your needs, but it could help. I'll give you what I have, but it's not much right now.
Another option you may want to consider, is Modest Needs. it's at modestneeds.org. It's an not for profit organization that helps out people with expenses to keep them from financial ruin. Only problem is it's like a prosper bidding type thing. But I've had sucess with it, and you don't have to pay it back. It's like a grant. It does take a few weeks to get approved and such. But it might be worth a shot!
And Sue, I want you to know that I know your reason for posting
And Sue, I want you to know that I know your reason for posting was not to ask for help, but more to vent. But you've been here a long time, and people will want to help you. :D
Sue, It is good to hear from you. I am sorry things are so di
Sue, It is good to hear from you. I am sorry things are so difficult right now and I am really happy to read you did not give in to the pdls. I know how difficult that was to do....been there. :hug: I certainly will keep you and your family in my prayers.
Thanks everyone - I really appreciate it. Goudah, you're ri
Thanks everyone - I really appreciate it.
Goudah, you're right - my reason for posting was not to ask for help, but to just vent and ask for some support for a bit, as I'm really having a hard time dealing with all of this right now. I can't say that I would turn down the offer of help - I would be foolish to do so under the circumstances right now - but that wasn't why I posted at all.
You might say I came to the end of my rope about 2 months ago, tied a knot and held on, and now the knot is unraveling and I'm hanging by a thread.
I appreciate the suggestion for help from Modest Needs - but I've tried them twice in the past for vehicle repairs, and never got enough "points" or whatever they call them to get the funding. So I ended up using my tax refund to put a downpayment on a decent vehicle and now have a vehicle payment, where I didn't have one on the old vehicle. If I could have gotten the Modest Needs grant to get that one fixed, things would be a lot better right now - but there's nothing I can do about that now. It's done.
I really appreciate the prayers and support.
I forgot to say thank you for your donation of points, Goudah.
I forgot to say thank you for your donation of points, Goudah. I really appreciate it.
Don't worry about that - every little bit helps at this point.
Don't worry about that - every little bit helps at this point. I really appreciate the gesture.
I'm trying to post a bit tonight - helping other people with their issues takes my mind off my own for a bit!
Suebee...just say no to payday loans! :shock: It will all w
Suebee...just say no to payday loans! :shock:
It will all work out. I was broke as a joke last week, taking back pop bottles and rolling pennies to put gas in the car, so I get how you feel. Stay strong, ok?
Sue, I have so been there and am there now. All I can say is kee
Sue, I have so been there and am there now. All I can say is keep your chin up, OK? I really think being in debt is more work than being rich... :twisted: We are always just a vent away, so feel free!
SueBee- I am sorry to hear about all you ar going through right
SueBee- I am sorry to hear about all you ar going through right now, I was thinking about you the other day. I have been where you are and not only is it no fun, it literaly turns your world upside down.
You know I am here to talk anytime you need me, and you and the boys are in my prayers.
Is there any way your son could catch a bus back to your house, I forget how old he is. For that matter, dont' know how expensive bus fares are, but may be worth checking out.
I had to have my ex bring my son back home several times, he sure didn't like it, but he got over it..You can only do what you can do at the time.
Hang in there, we are all here to help and pray!..karen :D
Thanks, Karen - He's only 10. I'm a little overprotective of
Thanks, Karen -
He's only 10. I'm a little overprotective of my kids, I guess, so letting them fly or ride a bus long-distance alone is not something I'm willing to do.
Things have not gotten a lot better in the last 24 hours - now I'm getting calls regarding my adult daughter - not from my daughter, but about her. The only time I hear from her is about once a month to say "everything's fine", when it's really not - and when I say it's not fine - it's not fine in a very big way.
I'm still scrabbling to figure a way to make this trip this weekend and still be able to pay bills. I'm going to make some phone calls today and tomorrow to see if there's any way to put a couple of bigger bills off until next week so I can try and get a handle on things.
Just keep praying, please...I'm struggling with this right now, and the added stress of my daughter's situation isn't helping.
Moneywise, I have Ebay auctions ending in the next couple of days that all have bidders watching them, but no bids - I can only pray that those watchers turn into bidders at the last minute. I'm also listing every night this week and trying to get as much out there as possible to get as much money coming in as possible.
I guess I'm going to try and call the ex and see what his take is on the idea of bringing our son all the way home. I'm pretty sure he will say no. Or if he agrees, he will want to keep part or all of the child support for next month (which I can't afford to let him do, after going all summer with only 1/2 the support). I guess it can't hurt to ask. I just HATE asking him to do things like that, because he holds it over my head later on. It ALWAYS comes back to bite me in the backside with him later.
Quote:I guess I'm going to try and call the ex and see what his
Quote:
I guess I'm going to try and call the ex and see what his take is on the idea of bringing our son all the way home. I'm pretty sure he will say no. Or if he agrees, he will want to keep part or all of the child support for next month (which I can't afford to let him do, after going all summer with only 1/2 the support). I guess it can't hurt to ask. I just HATE asking him to do things like that, because he holds it over my head later on. It ALWAYS comes back to bite me in the backside with him later. |
I called and asked. He can't do it due to work. (He owns his own company.) He asked if I needed money for the trip and I told him NO. I do need the money for the trip, but when money comes from him, it comes with strings attached.
I completely relate to the strings that are attached to borrowin
I completely relate to the strings that are attached to borrowing money from your ex. Been there, done that, and I pray I'll never do it again! I could easily be in your shoes in the future, with my ex living in Michigan and my being in NY. Our order states that I provide transportation to Michigan and he provides back to NY. I am hoping that I will always have the cash to do this, cause he'll make my life he!! if I can't. I had to go to court recently to get the judge's permission to move my children out of state. The whole thing just isn't fun!
No, it's not fun at all, Polly. That I can definitely vouch for
No, it's not fun at all, Polly. That I can definitely vouch for. And it was MY choice to move over 600 miles away from him and take the kids with me. He had to sign legal documents allowing me to do so. (And don't think THAT hasn't come up a time or two in arguments...)
I have had to borrow money from him in the past, and after the last go-round, I was determined to never do it again. I am also determined to become completely independent of the child support and be able to simply bank that for the kids' future needs, as I know the child support won't last forever. In fact, if my youngest decides to go live with his dad at any point in the near future (which is entirely possible), the child support would end a lot faster than I expect. So I am trying to prepare myself for that happening.
Just a quick update to everyone... First, let me thank those
Just a quick update to everyone...
First, let me thank those who made donations to me in an effort to help me through this hard time. Your kindness means more than I can express in words, and I will never forget it. I have helped others here in the past with donations of points myself, and now I can tell you first hand how it feels to be on the receiving end. Your help made the trip to pick up my son possible.
We did make the trip to pick up my son from his visit to his dad's on Saturday. It was a LONG trip (780+ miles), and was beautiful on the way down, but pretty rough on the way back. I'm just very thankful we made it back safely. We had multiple delays due to county fair traffic, drag race event trafffic, a loooong train crossing, an accident on the road ahead of us, and then torrential wind/rain/hail storms that made it difficult to even see the road, let alone other vehicles. But we made it!
Things will slowly get better, I know - it's just difficult to see it sometimes.
I really appreciate everyone's help, and just wanted to make sure everyone knew it. I won't forget how you've helped me.
Glad you were able to make it there and are back safely. Have a
Glad you were able to make it there and are back safely. Have a blessed week..karen :D
Sue, thanks for the update. I am happy you all made it back sa
Sue, thanks for the update. I am happy you all made it back safe and sound. :D Just know you and your family will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers.
I am so glad the little donations added up and helped you a lot!
I am so glad the little donations added up and helped you a lot! I have prayed for you and I know your life will be better! Thanks for keeping in touch!