Time for me to speak MY mind

Fins, I agree with you. When I first came here as a guest, if I'd have seen some of the bashing posts, I would never have even asked my questions. I would have moved on. It was because of how everyone jumped on and answered my questions that I decided to become a member. I hope it can get back to how it was then.

please i want to ask all of you to make a prayer for my husband please.
portofolio recovery associates every sunday call here and i have to disconnect my phone in the week.
thanks GOD BLESS ALL OF YOU.I REPORT THEM NOW AND I HAVE 69*PROOF they call my number.thanks

Tania, you and your husband are in my prayers :D Karen

finsfan13,
I work an office job that used to be really rewarding, working with the veterans, I am proud to serve the young men and women who come back from Iraq and other foreign countries deal with re entering employment.
However, do to short staffing I have a few more duties, like dealing with the felony offenders, I am having a real problem with one group. The sex offenders put knots in my gut, I can't work with these individuals in the same way that I deal with the other felon offenders. I put on my blinders, but I just can't get past it, any advice? I guess, it is the child sex offenders that really get me down. I recently had to start dealing with the deadbeat mom and dads that come into the office too. Alot of them are just going through the motions, they don't attempt to get jobs, they just do what they need to do to get my signature.

I am really have issues with the sex offenders though, any advice you could give me would be much appreciated. thanks in advance

fedup, pm me..I don't know that I can give you any advice, but I can definitely be a good shoulder to vent on. It disgusts me too.

Back to the Yahoo Group or myspace idea, let's pick a name for it, then I'll go set it up.

Quote:

I have a pretty good idea who this is against. The person meant no harm. It is like most of us have experienced, someone posts as guest and slams the mods, or members of the board because they didn't like what happened!

OK.....for what's it's worth (and really, I wouldn't put it on eBay if I were you), let me interject my thoughts:

Where has this board been? It started with a fantastic idea - let's have a place where average people can discuss their debt and financial mistakes, and their experience getting out of the same, to help and advise others that have or are currently in a similar situation. Brilliant. Simple and brilliant.

Where is it now? This board grows with leaps and bounds on a daily basis. The free exchange of thoughts and ideas prompts open discussions where no one is excluded and all input is desired.

Where is the problem? I think the problem is two-fold. {And before I state what I see, let me say first that resolving these issues is not simple, because the nature of man (and woman), and with the premise of this open forum, give rise to these issues.} The first is the open attacks by guest posters that make little attempt to present their cases, but instead engage is personal attacks in members of this forum that are trying to get their lives in order. We all make mistakes, and the vast number of people here want to resolved those mistakes, but through improper and immoral actions, their are scared and feel threatened. Coming here gives them a sense that they are not alone, and also that they will survive. But when guests (that tend to be people on the debt collection side of the industry) attack members, it usually starts a waterfall of attacks from both sides. At that time, all is lost. The other issue is the belief that the moderators of this forum have some Nazi attitude, crushing free speech and promoting personal agendas. I will admit, from a personal standpoint, I can think that way. I have to remember that this is an open forum, and people need to have the right to talk freely. I use my mod power to cleanup posts that violate the TOS (personal info and links) and to delete duplicate posts/threads. And yeah - I am sick of the Secret Cash Card multiple threads (can't people read?). But other than that, the only threat I have made is to start deleting posts that are nothing more than personal attacks on members that I hold in high regard. At that is usually everybody. Personal attacks on me - I like to leave them. I wear those as a badge of honor.

What can we do? Ok - here is the hard question. If you allow all to be posted, you allow people to carry personal, unfounded attacks that can get out of line and out of order. If you selectively edit such posts, you are considered censoring. My thought - unless if is over disgusting, leave it. Allow the poster to be represented by what they say. Let their poor grammar and childish remarks be the basis of who they are. It's actually pretty funny to read when you get down to it. Now, as members, we need to do two things. First - ignore these people. It's like when we were kids and someone stole our hat at the bus stop. We would chase and chase while they tossed it around. But when we stopped, it wasn't fun for them anymore and we got our hat back. Same deal. If we ignore them, they will just stop. Also, we all need to thicken our skin. We know who we are. Why do we let some anonymous person tell us the type of human being we are? We all have friends and family that love and care about us, and we get pissed because some person, who doesn't have the guts to show their face, tell us what we are? We are all smarter than that. That is why you see me on here cracking jokes all the time - to lighten the mood. And yeah - I go after these attackers with the same comedic attitude. Pull them from the dark and laugh at them. And you know - the attackers need to thicken up a little as well. If you have an issue with someone, PM them. It could all be a misunderstanding. But keep it private. Would you yell at your spouse or child in the middle of the store, or would you pull them aside and keep it quiet and personal?

Let's do our best to stop what we have been in the recent past and get back to the basics. Anything that strays from the basics should just be ignored.


17%.


Research shows that 17% is the tipping point. When 17% of people believe and are committed to something, then change begins. We can be that 17%. We can be the start that changes the whole industry. We can begin to force these collectors to follow the law or close shop. We can stop the predatory lending that exists in the world. We can get people to wake up and think to live in their means instead of thinking the world owes them something and in the long run passing their financial burden on to us. We can be the example.

Jeff,

You brought up some good points about ignoring certain posts. I think some people come here just to get people riled up. We've had it happen in the past. I have been a moderator for awhile and it's very rare that I actually moderate. Sometimes, it's just to remove an e-mail address or personal info. Others, it's to remove duplicate postings on the same link. I ususually only edit my own posts. Ari, I'm glad to hear that you found a job that you liked :-) It makes all the difference in the world. Tammy, please say in school. I know that you can get better grades. You are a smart woman :-) Find something that really interests you and you have a passion for.

This is my observation about this saga. I noticed that there are well over 100 people on this site a lot of the time. Of those 100, 10 maximum are members. Of those 10, 5 maybe are titled members. Statistically, that is not many compared to guests. Its seems to me that if there were no guests here, this would be nothing. I think there is to much noise advising to ignore guests, to much putting down guests. I think some members have a position/title, and they feel that makes them better than guests and gives them the right to openly berate guests. It turns out they are doing exactly what they are slamming guests for doing. Not all of us guests are bad, but we seem to be lumped all together and don't get a fair shake right from the get go. Some members/title holders go both ways all the time. One post bashing guests the next one claiming all they want to do is help guests. I would think that the members/title holders would want to set an example of the type of behavior this board deserves instead of fueling the fire. This board is completely out of control, and I can see why the members who have been here forever want to go away. What a shame. The information provided was so valsuable, but has been completely overshadowed by this stupid game being played. Members vs Guests. Just my opinion.

my thoughts - allow me one question, and please, it is not me attacking.

For what reason do you choose to remain an unregistered member?

No offense taken. To answer your question, jedijeff13. I just wanted to browse around for a while to see what this stie was all about before I made a decision to join. Kind of like testing the waters before jumping in. In all honesty, at this point, this is not someting I want to be a member of. And if you would also allow me one question, and this also is not an attack, why is it so important that people become registered members?

None attack taken. To me - whether you register or not really doesn't matter. But I wonder if some people don't register thinking there will be expectations of them, or their personal data will be sold, or a number of other things. We have all had horror stories of crap like that.

I like having the PM feature here. I can discuss something with another registered user without giving out any more info then they already know. That, is a great option. I don't have to talk about it via email (unless I so choose).

Could people find me? Sure. BUT....if I choose a unique user name, I would be quite invisible to the world.

I do think that having unregistered users post is a very unique feature you won't find at many other websites. Giving guest users such an option is a nice thing. Like you said - try it before you like it.

Oh wait.....we were too nice to each other.


Ummm.....you have ....er.....stinky feet!!!! :D

Members earn DebtCC points for every post they do in the forums and this can be redeemed into cash. This has been real helpful to some people in small emergencies. I have my points accumulated here and wish to buy a new mobile set using these points. :)

Jeff, You have definitely made some valid points. I still stand by my belief that ANYONE has a voice here, as long as they are clean and non-agressive.

My main beef is this..And I have talked this over with other members of the forum this weekend..People who are members of this forum are coming out swinging, and that's just not cool. Every guest that comes here is a potential new victim, I mean member, and creating a hostile environment will do nothing but drive them away. Why can't we listen to what someone has to say before jumping them? How would we feel if someone didn't listen to us?

Yes, I'm a moderator too, but it's a title I've earned by living through debt hell and surviving it. We are not running a business here, the moderators are not "managers" and the debt samaritans are not "assistant managers". This is the attitude that some have taken lately, and I think that's ridiculous. we have no more rights or say than anyone else on this board! We are not in charge here, we're simply here to keep it clean and unrepetitive.

I think a lot of people have missed my point completely, and that's fine. Because chances are if you've missed my point and have no idea what the hell I'm talking about, then you are not contributing to the problem that myself and several other members see.

Fins - I know what you are talking about- it seems like the baby steps that I took - am taking to solve my finacial problems is passe and I have only been here a few months. I remember all of you literally taking me by the proverbial hand at the beginning and walking me through everything. Now sometimes it seems to move too fast - I am not so sure that the proccess is as easy as some are making it to be, but that is just my 2 cents - for what it is worth.

Irish, your 2 cents is worth A LOT to me! :D

Arguments will always happen when different people are interacting on the same place, just because each one has their own way of seeing the picture. I have always felt that the mods and debt samaritans here have kept their role very nicely and they deserve a loud applause. A new guest knows very little about this forum and we need to give him/her time to understand everything about us. However, a few come with a different perspective to hurt others and they are not in the list of my worries. I don't feel like responding to their lines. They want to break the unity of members who have given a long time here and if one goes away, they target the next one. We should clearly understand who values this place and who does not.

Fins, Once again I am glad I have missed the drama. LOL Have no idea what has been going on . I agree with you on the guests posting as long as its clean no need to slam anybody. For so long we had so many people slamming us that I thought it would never end. I hope things work out here. I miss all of you all so much. Dont get on here much anymore. Ari I am so glad you found a differnt job and maybe that blood pressure will get better. KYSIDE38

Thanks Fins. Along the same lines that Trenity is going - there have been times that I have felt that maybe "we" as a collective group are getting to someone or many someones and they are enjoying every time that there is a rift or some type of bashing going on here - with the thought that it will distroy the forum and the help that is given here.

finsfan(and anyone esle, I know from reading she is a rabid football fan), did you happen to see Peyton Manning on SNL? He was so funny. It was one of the funniest I have seen in a long time.

Guest, Peyton was HYSTERICAL!! I stayed up late just so I wouldn't miss it, I found out about it a few weeks ago and I was ready. I've always recognized his talent, of course, but thought he was a bit stuffy and uptight. My opinion has changed.

I agree with Jedideff and Fins. If someone posts, ;let them post, as long as it isn't breaking the rules set down. If we reply to attacks, that is what the school yard bully wants, leave them alone! I don't care if you are a guest or member, I will treat you with the same respect, and offer the same help. Can we just get back to what the purpose of this forum is about- helping people? I,too, mod, but I take into consideration what I delete, move or anything. If I am not sure, I have PM Mike for advice-it's just a title. I won't respond to nasty negative posts-there are too many people here that need help--My 2 cents!! :lol: Karen

Amen sister! :D

What makes anyone better than anyone else?

I agree with you all with all my heart. I do have to admit I have bashed some payday collectors that have been on here. I am GUILTY!!!! I just couldnt help it. They started it. Anyways I sure have took my amount of bashing also and its not fun. We have all tried here to do the best we can. I guess sometimes its just not good enough for some people. I would like to think I have helped someone. With all of the help I received here when I first came I felt it was only right to return the favor. At least I became educated not only on payday loans but many issues . Not bad for a WV hillbilly. LOL KYSIDE38

Kyside, you have helped a ZILLION people! You know PDLS inside and out! If I needed help, I would go to you, Mishele, Polly, or Steelers. I mean it.

As far as bashing..Hey, if someone starts it, then they're fair game! :D What I'm saying is that we all need to follow the rules of the board. All of us. We can't delete posts because we just don't like them, and we need to give guests..No matter who they are..A fair podium. Everyone can learn something from everyone, regardless of we like their job or even them..We can all take something from everyone.

Kyside, payday loan collectors break the law quite liberally. They bring it on themselves. Guilt should not enter into it.

Fins,
I hope you are doing ok? As you can see,I am back in the saddle. I have read thru your post and you bring up some very good points.We are all human and can/will make mistakes. I took a day off and seriously considered longer to get away from the negative aspects of what is happening here. I admit if someone comes on the board and is raising heck,I am gonna bite back.We do need to try and get this board under control so we can help the people that want help.With the spam and flaming going on,there has been little time to do our part in helping out. I do not agree with the guest posting because I like to know at least a basic profile of who I am talking too. I support Mike and Vikas's decision on it though. Guests that post here,let me say one more thing and then I am gonna step off my soapbox.Go to the link in the pub and read our rules.I for one am getting very weary of all these flame and hate mails.

Thank you Ari... At least I know someone agrees that they do break the law. KYSIDE38

Kyside..Of course they break the laws! BUT..if a person works for the company, they are not the ones breaking the laws. I guess I see things differently because I have a job that makes me very very very unpopular. I have to fight the union daily. I have to garnish wages, I have to punish people. Sometimes I don't want to, but I have to..Because it's my job, and it's the only one I have right now. The person in my job before me was mean and nasty, and passed judgement on the employees with problems. I can't do that, and won't...Sometimes people have to work certain types of jobs because of the hours, all of us with kids know that. So I won't bash someone because they work for a PDL. If they come on bashing us, though..You better believe I'm gonna give it right back at them.

Cajun- I'm doing well..How are YOU? We are all guilty of mistakes, I've been in a few hot and heavy fights on this board myself..(Doug Danger!) I try my hardest never to pass judgement. As far as those vile guest posts go...Rip into them or ignore them! :D There is no call for them, and since everyone has freedom of speech here, that gives us the right to defend ourselves. I can see why you don't like guest posting, but remember that A LOT of guests turn into valuable members if treated fairly. I know, because I was one of them, and Ari was too. Besides, as we've seen in the past, even not allowing guests won't stop the nonsense..Plenty of people don't have anything better to do than register and attack us! :twisted:

Anyway, glad you're back dude!

Trenity,

That was very well spoken :-) Thank you.

Here is my two cents about the payday lenders or collectors. There was one who posted on the forums last year that was very helpful to me. I don't think she posts here anymore but she was quite helpful. Also, there was another lady who worked for one of the payday lenders that I defaulted on who came to my rescue after being treated poorly by one of their collectors. She came to me and turned the situation around.

Fins, You are required to do a job. I am sure that you do an excellent job. . What I was talking about agreeing with Ari is that most of the payday people do break the law. Even the ones that work there. When they call someone for say here in WV and threaten them with arrest is that not breaking the law? Especially since they were ILLEGAL here to begin with. I did not maean any disrespect towards your job. If I sounded like that I am sorry. If a payday person comes on here and bashes me I do fight back. I took their abuse for so long I think its a natural defense. KYSIDE38

I agree with you 100%. Threatening someone with arrest IS illegal, and I agree that most of them DO break the law! But when one of them posts here, I have to give them the benefit of the doubt until they turn nasty. Then I fight back!

Kyside, part of the reason why I adore you so much is because you WON'T take any crap. But I know you..And I think that if there was a PDL rep on here that was being pleasant, you'd be pleasant right back!

Fins, I adore you to. I have been pleasant in the past but I have also been a raving madwoman also. I think my judgement gets in the way alot. Thats not good. KYSIDE38

LOL, I think a little bit of emotion is a good thing..It can drive you. I think the fact that you are emotional is part of the reason why you have been so successful in your PDL war!

Think about this Kyside..You and I just showed the entire board how to have a debate without anyone getting upset! :D Does this mean we are grown-ups? :shock:

Yea!1 We actually do have grown ups here!! :lol: We are always gonna have spam and there will always be "guests"-Thank God for the guests!! They are, and have been becoming members more and more. I fear that will soon stop if this Forum doesn't get back where it should be. too, was a guest for quite a while- I didn't want to slap my personal info on the net for everyone. But I got so much help and support from everyone-I became a member. No one treated me any different than a memebr, so tha's why I answer and treat everyone the same. This forum, and the people before me, helped suppodrt me in getting out of debt, and for that, I am gratefull..KAren