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Favorite TV Chef!

Date: Fri, 10/19/2007 - 11:29

Submitted by Frogpatch
on Fri, 10/19/2007 - 11:29

Posts: 5381 Credits: [Donate]

Total Replies: 210


When I was growing up there was the Galloping Goumet and Julia Child. Other guys were watching Combat and I was watching cooking shows. Then came Justin Wilson and Pierre Franey and that strange frugal gourmet guy Jeff Smith. Now there is the food network and also Create network. My wife records Lidia Bastanich every day so we can watch it at night. Rachel Ray has become her own corporation. Bobby Flay took Southwest to another dimension and and we all watched as the that chef lost his business in the reality show. The list is endless.
The weekend is starting and half the country is going to try a recipe they got from Jaques Pepin or Mariane Esposito. So tell me please, who is your favorite celebrity chef and why?


Right!! It was Dan Ackroyd! He borrowed the blood thing from Monty Python. Here is the script.
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Julia Child: Welcome. I'm Julia Child. Today, we're going to make a holiday feast, and we're going to start with a half-boned chicken, a fine, fat roasting chicken. Now, first, remove the giblets - and you really should save the giblets. They make a fine stock for soup. Or you can save the liver and fry it up with some onions for a little snack; or if you have a number of livers, you can make a lovely liver pate, or a delicious liverwurst which you can spread on a cracker - a Ritz cracker, a Saltine... or rye bread, or pumpernickel bread... or if you're celebrating the Jewish holidays, you can make a chopped liver and shape it into the bust of a friend... if someone's getting married or bar-mitzvahed... am I saying that right? Bar-mitzvahed? Or, if you have a little cat or a dog, they love liver. Save the liver! Don't throw it away! I hope I've made my point. Don't throw the liver away. Now, where was I? Oh, yes. Anyway, it's time to bone the chicken. Now, for this, you need a very sharp knife. You can't do nothing without a sharp knife!
[She holds chicken and cuts along it with a sharp knife]
Julia Child: Now, you place the chicken on its stomach, and cut along the backbone to the pug nose like so...
[She suddenly drops the knife ]
Julia Child: Crap! Oh! Oh, now I've done it - I've cut the dickens out of my finger. Well, I'm glad, in a way, this has happened...
[Blood squirts out of her hand onto the chicken]
Julia Child: We have never really discussed what to do. First, we must stop the bleeding.
[She holds her apron over her hand]
Julia Child: The best way is to put pressure on the apron, like so...
[Blood keeps sqirting all over the kitchen]
Julia Child: Now, you want to raise your hand above your head so the blood doesn't pump all the way up.
[Blood continues to squirt, going everywhere]
Julia Child: Well, the apron doesn't seem to be working, so I recommend natural coagulants, such as chicken liver...
[picks up the chicken liver]
Julia Child: Remember not to throw away the liver!
[Blood gushes over the chicken liver]
Julia Child: Oh, God, it's throbbing! Well, a tourniquet can be made, using a chicken bone...
[She wraps a towel and a chicken bone around her hand]
Julia Child: Find a pressure point between the heart and the wound - in this case, the wrist - and cut off the blood. This is a last resort, however, because you could lose your hand if you tighten it too much!
[the blood keeps on squirting. She starts to get a little woozy]
Julia Child: If you're too woozy to tie the tourniquet, you might call Emergency Help - there's not much time left...
[She hobbles towards the phone on back wall and picks it up]
Julia Child: Now, every kitchen phone should have the Emergency number written on it somewhere...
[She looks at her phone ]
Julia Child: This one doesn't! 9-1-1!
[She tries to dial the number, but can't]
Julia Child: Oh, this phone is a prop, it doesn't work!
[She drops the phone, becoming increasingly woozy]
Julia Child: That's a shame, because I'm remembering a time when I was a little girl and I... had a dog named Admiral... and I used to give him liver... and my mother gave me a doll...
[She starts tipping from side to side and stares blankly at the audience]
Julia Child: Why are you all spinning? Uh... I think I'm going to go to sleep now... bon appetit...
[She falls headfirst onto the counter on top of the chicken, but manages to jump up one last time]
Julia Child: Save the liver!
[She falls back onto the counter and twitches before dying]


lrhall41

Submitted by Frogpatch on Mon, 10/22/2007 - 12:47

( Posts: 5381 | Credits: )


Hey...at least I was 3 years old. I remember the first SL I ever saw. It was the 3-mile island parody where they had President Carter taking a tour of the nuclear plant, and he came out glowing from the radiation. Oh....and 10 feet tall. I remember laughing so hard my brother squirted milk out his nose. But...for chefs...I LOVE Paula Deen. She is too darn cute! I grew up in the south, and she reminds me of everything i miss about it. If my bank ever opens a branch in Savannah, GA, I'm dragging my husband with me and we're moving. He can learn to deal with the humidity. I love Anthony Bourdain, too. He's such a New Yorker. Short and to the point with that great sarcasm. Did you see the one where he was in Lebanon rigth when the last fighting broke out between Lebanon and Israel? Scary stuff.


lrhall41

Submitted by swedishgirl on Mon, 10/22/2007 - 14:25

( Posts: 326 | Credits: )


I like Paula Dean. I think it is because she really looks like she is enjoying what she is doing and enjoying her food and the heck with calories! That is my type of cook!!!! :P

I also like Semi-Homemade. I don't remember the person's name that does the show and not that she really has an outstanding personality, but she has some good ideas on how to make things easier.


lrhall41

Submitted by 2nband on Tue, 10/23/2007 - 16:47

( Posts: 2277 | Credits: )