How to ask for financial help from a friend or family

By: on 2019-02-08
Ask Good Nelly

Asking for financial support and help from a friend or family is a bit awkward! However, at times, you should not hesitate to ask for help. That’s what friends and family members are for. You shouldn't hesitate when you’re in dire need. However, there are a few tactics you need to follow to ask for monetary help from a friend or a family member.

How to ask for money politely

Here are a few great tips on how to ask for financial help from a friend or family.

a Select the person from whom to ask help

First of all, you have to select from whom you’ll ask help. It might be a friend from whom you had already taken help.

It is better to borrow money from a friend or a family member who has disposable income.

If you don’t want anyone else to know about it, then choose someone who doesn’t have the habit to let others know about this matter.

Avoid a person who wants to show others how generous he/she is by letting the world know about his/her good gesture.

b Let the other person know that you’ve tried and relied on his/her advice

While asking for financial help and support from a person, mention that you’ve tried on your own before asking for help. Doing so, your friend or a family member will be assured that you’re asking the money for a definite purpose.

While talking, make sure you mention that you relied on that person’s advice and appreciate it even now.

c Explain clearly how much you want and for what purpose

Before you ask for help from a person, you have to figure out your needs. It will help you explain your financial situation to your friend or family member.

It goes without saying that when you ask for financial help, you need to give an explanation of your present monetary condition. Your friend is lending you a portion of his/her hard-earned money; so, you need to discuss why you need it and how you plan to pay it back.

The more you discuss this with the person, the chances are higher that you’ll get monetary help from that person.

Another important thing, don’t make the person guess or assume about how much you want.

For example, if you need help to make a down payment on your home, mention that clearly and the amount you need. It is obviously a better choice than buying private mortgage insurance for this purpose.

d Decide how you want to convince the person

Do not beat around the bush. Practice beforehand, in front of a mirror, how you want to convince the person. Practicing will make you more confident and convincing.

You can use any of the 2 popular tactics. The first tactic is, at first, ask for a small help and when the person agrees, ask for the actual favor/amount. In the second tactic, ask for a larger favor and when a person denies, make a relatively smaller request, which is more reasonable, that he/she won’t be able to deny.

An important thing - Schedule a date and time with the person by asking for his/her leisure time to discuss an important matter.

e Give some time to the person to think

Don’t expect that you get immediate help in most cases. You need to give some time to your friends and family members to think over it and decide, especially if it’s a comparatively large sum.

So, after you explain your financial situation, thank that person for listening to you.

Next, even if he/she is your friend, ask politely and it’s always better to talk to that person face-to-face. Psychologists say that talking face to face increases the chances of a positive reply.

As I was saying, after explaining, give some time and follow up by paying a casual visit or making a phone call. Make sure you talk something else; don’t ask about what he/she has decided about lending money. If that person is willing, he/she will bring in the topic and talk about it.

However, in your next phone call, you can politely ask about his/her decision and respect it no matter what the answer is.

f Make sure you give back the amount on time

When a person agrees to lend you an amount, make sure you establish terms and conditions on the loan. Make sure you get an agreement in writing. This will help both of you to avoid misunderstandings in the future.

Mention in the agreement how you want to pay back the amount. If paying back in a large sum is a bit difficult for you, you can request to repay in decent installments. Ask your friend whether or not he/she will face a problem in this mode of payment. It will help you plan your finances.

It is always better to repay the amount before the time. Moreover, it is a great gesture to pay some interest on the borrowed amount.

What will you do after you get the amount? First of all, make sure you use the amount for the purpose you’ve borrowed it.

At last, I should mention that this shouldn’t happen again and again. As already discussed, once you borrow an amount, make sure you pay it back within the time, as promised, and be grateful to that person for helping you. If possible, do something for him/her. As a token of appreciation, you can cook a meal or offer some help, such as shoveling snow, picking up groceries, and so on.

Remember the famous quote, “A friend in need, is a friend indeed”.

Manage your finances in a way not to borrow money from that friend again, in the future. However, it depends on your relationship and whether or not you paid back the amount on time. But, it is not advisable to make it a recurrent affair.

And, another important thing, even if your friend refuses to pay you the amount, it shouldn’t harm your friendship. It may be your friend who is unwilling or he/she has some financial issues for which he/she cannot lend you the money. So, don’t let money come in between your friendship ever.

And. most importantly, manage your money in such a way that you don't have to ask for financial help from a friend or family, in the future.

Last Updated on: Fri, 8 Feb 2019

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